Branna: To Every Season . . .
As we’re facing the upcoming summer-to-fall transition, it reminds me that not only Mother Nature dictates our “seasons.” We roam through runs of relationships our entire life – periods of preferred peers as kids, countless courtships and rendezvous’s with our various “Mr. and Mrs. Wrongs and Rights,” the perpetual period of parenthood and the ups and downs of friendships (and foes) throughout a lifetime. I’ve made it no secret that reconnecting the rapport with my Noblesville heritage has been a jaunt of pure joy. Old friendships have become new again, and new affiliations are appearing all the time. From toddler times in Sunday school to my current senior status, I’ve met some absolutely awesome people throughout my linear journey.
Strangely, there is a sadness, and sometimes a gladness, in the ebb and flow of relationships. How many times in our life span have we said we would never, ever lose touch with someone perfectly precious to us? It wasn’t so hard to do decades ago when we weren’t such a mobile mankind. Many of us were blessed with being born and raised in the same hometown for at least our first 18 years. I remember in college hearing someone referring to Noblesville as a “bedroom community.” I found that particularly perplexing. I came to understand that what they were referring to is a small community that has no major industries, and that is lived in by people who go to another town or city to work (i.e. Indianapolis). I also remember in my period at Purdue telling people I was from Indy, because I feared no one had heard of Noblesville in other parts of the state or country. But look at Nob City now! We’re all grown up and a force to be reckoned with! But back to the topic at hand – the seasons and reasons behind relationships.
Yes, I too am guilty of the promise of never parting with people who I believe have a permanent piece of my heart. Unfortunately, this didn’t come to fruition. The contact through communication may have ceased, however, I still love pondering the people that have gotten me to where I am today. So many memories, so much love, and so much gratitude for those that never gave up on me! I’ve started putting back into practice that promise I made years ago. When a person from my past pops into my mind, when possible, I stop whatever I’m doing to (as I’ve written before) “reach out and touch someone.” I often meet with superfluous surprise at first, which turns immediately into a magical mosey down Memory Lane. Usually, it’s just a quick text or a message on Facebook, but it opens the door to a love never lost.
But then there are those seasons where, sadly, the most cared-for connections did not endure, at least not in the capacity we were hoping for. Just like Noblesville has grown and developed, we as individuals have done the same. Our experiences have melded our mindsets and synthesized ourselves into ever-changing beings. Our outlook and locations have taken us in different directions, and sometimes the path with our peers will part. My 7 Habits training with Stephen Covey challenged me with that “Win-Win” principle that can appear impossible. I also learned the value of the phrase, “ agree to disagree” in an effort of salvaging our dearest devotednesses. Sometimes relationships can prevail over disparities and actually bolster the bond between you. Other times, it’s the deciding factor in whether or not to move forward toward more fruitful affiliations. Aside from the aches, pains, wrinkles and age spots, getting older has fostered some foresight into friendships for me. I’ve come to believe that sometimes it’s better to cherish the good, but move on when you should. Instead of staying in stagnant circumstances, model mental health mandates that we learn our limitations. Who was it who said: “ Surround yourself only with those who will lift you higher?” Wise words indeed and one of my (many) mantras.
Why waste our precious time worrying about things we cannot change? I say we fondly reflect on the positive proponents in our life, both past and present. Call it “personal pruning,” if you will. There’s no shame in knowing when to let go and grow. That’s when you can consider yourself “well-seasoned!”
Branna (McCarty) Shores believes that “HOME is where your story begins.” A Noblesville native and proud graduate of NHS and Purdue University, she is a professional speaker, advocate for mental health and work / family balance and retired social worker. Branna is the mother of two grown daughters, six precious grandchildren and wife of one brave husband! Her passions include singing, writing and sharing the lighter side of life through lessons learned, both personally and professionally. She can be contacted at branna18@gmail.com